Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
