I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize