I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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