Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
