I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize