Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
