I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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