well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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