hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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