carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
