New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
