Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
