Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
We had sex on a dog bed..
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
