ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Well I just put wine in my tea
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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