I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
