it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Randomize