I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
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