Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
