I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
