we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
handjob tips. give me some.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
