im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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