I hate your face
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
i think my cat just said my name.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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