You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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