Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
So many bounce houses so little time
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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