hell yes lets make some ravioli
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
