Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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