There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
smell my finger.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize