I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
