May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
