my phone cant type all the emotion im having
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
