Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize