we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
