Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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