tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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