Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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