Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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