have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
