I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
there's paper in my vomit.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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