I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Drunk is a universal language darling
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
