Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
