Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just threw up on my dentist
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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