My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
There was a lot of him and a little penis
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
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