I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
