You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
