my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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