I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
