Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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