two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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