doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
