I seem to have left my pride at pride
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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