Just fell off a train. Bad.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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